Wonderland Wanderess

Christopher Jr.  Due: 11/09/2012 This is our story.... The details of the horrific tragedy which claimed the life of Christopher Jr.'s father can be found on Wonderland Wanderess, under the title of "Til Death, did we Part".  "Lachlan's Birth Story", also found on Wonderland Wanderess, details the traumatic experience I endured with my firstborn. Both of these events contributed to my decision to birth my second child via cesarean section. ~ My C-section was scheduled to take place at 39 weeks gestation.  While I wasn't sure what to expect from this form of birth, I assumed it had to be better than the hell I'd been through with Lachlan's induced birth.  That was my first mistake!  You know what they say about the word, "assume"! Once again, my mother would be by my side, just as she had been throughout Lachlan's birth.  This time she would be decked out in blue scrubs and booties- "Paging Dr. Gre...

My first birth was certainly an experience—it was difficult and traumatic. Regardless, I will always find beauty in it.  My son, Lachlan, was worth every second of the pain and I learned so much from his birth that would make my next natural delivery far easier. I have blogged the story of this subsequent labour, under the title Tales of a VBAC Hypnobirth . ~ I was well overdue with Lachlan and it felt like I had been pregnant forever and a day. I was so very over being ridiculously huge and uncomfortable. When the time to be induced came, the hospital was overcrowded with labouring mothers. They informed me I would need to phone the birthing suite each night to see if a bed was available and that if my labour commenced spontaneously in the mean, they would of course deal with it; however, they would not proceed with an induction without adequate staff or facilities. Each night I phoned the outcome remained the same: no free beds. As Easter 2010 drew nearer,  the hospital ...

TRIGGER WARNING: this post contains very graphic detail, which some may find distressing My eldest son, Lachlan, did not ever meet his biological father, Dean.  Their entire father/son relationship amounted to approximately 3 telephone calls throughout the time between Lachlan's birth in 2010, and Dean's untimely death.  This aside, Lachlan and I were both lucky enough to find an amazing man, who not only loved me more fiercely and passionately than I had ever known, but also loved my son as though he were his own—Chris—the first man I ever truly loved.   When Chris and I discovered I was pregnant, we were surprised but thrilled.  We had our first ultrasound at 6 weeks and I will never forget the look of sheer wonder, delight and adoration on Chris's face as he watched the screen and listened to our baby's heartbeat.   I recall thinking, this is how it's supposed to be —i t's going to be so different this time around — it's going to be perfect.....

I have always been open about being pro-life. I know this is a sensitive topic but please hold off on lugging out the torches and pitchforks just yet. There is a heartfelt story behind my steadfast view. A few months ago an acquaintance accused me of unfairly judging my fellow women by being pro-life, rather than pro-choice.  I responded, 'I don't judge women who make that choice because, there but for the grace of God, go I.' She replied, 'So, you're pro-life but don't judge a woman for making a choice? I don't understand.' Well, what led me to be pro-life? That is the story that needs telling to answer her question. I was 20 years old when I learned I was pregnant for the first time. A few months prior, I fled from a toxic 2 year, on again/off again relationship, riddled with domestic violence and drug dependence. He was what I thought at the time was my first love. How wrong I was. I had no idea what love was then, but he was all I knew. I was dy...